One of the happiest things we did this week was to find a Mexican restaurant and go to dinner with many other senior missionaries. Several of these missionaries work in the mission office and their help is needed and appreciated every day. We don't know what we would do without them. One couple came to the Philippines to serve at the education center and they are witnessing the growth of the Pathway program. Another couple flies from island to island organizing humanitarian service projects. The final couple serves as MLS missionaries and are living a couple of hours south of Cebu City, helping to build up a small branch. We have come together here in Cebu with a common purpose, to build the kingdom of God. We feel great love and admiration for the people in this picture!

Mexican food is rare here, so this restaurant was a great find! Even if I had just partaken the chips and guac, I would have left happy.

 

I admire the compassion this man displayed for the woman he met at the gas station. I want to be one who the Lord can count on to reach out to someone He puts in my path.

 

At 5:30 in the morning, these two elders woke up to water up to their ankles on their apartment fllor. Typhoon Tino had hit and their neighborhood and street were flooding. Within a half hour, they were standing on their desks and the water was up to their waists and rising. They had been told by a well-meaning individual to stay in their apartment because the flood waters would carry them away, but they knew they needed to get out of their apartment. They broke open a window and swam out. Somehow they climbed up an outer wall and got on their roof, and then walked across rooftops until they were invited into a woman's balcony. I have video footage of them on the balcony with the flood waters down below. The waters carried parked cars down the street and piled them on top of each other. We feel God's hand in their escape!

Though saddened that many of their belongings were carried down stream or are now completely covered in mud, they salvaged what they could from their apartment. We offered our power hose to them and they spent many hours in the front yard hosing off their items. It was our pleasure to offer them a few meals, laundry soap, and listening ears.

Imagine our surprise when they showed up at the house this week with flowers for us and a thank you card for helping them through their ordeal. How can they think outward when they have been dealt such a blow? They are amazing men! I admire their patience and faith. I admire the way they have handled this. They are trying to be optimistic. They are heroes to me.

 

There is so much to say about this amazing woman! Her name is Kimber and she is serving with her husband here in the Cebu, Philippines mission. I call her "extra-mile Kimber," because she finds things to do in many areas and many ways to brighten the lives of the missionaries. We had a Mission Leader Conference this past week and she made a french toast breakfast for the 26 missionaries, including a variety of homemade syrups. She and her husband help with purchasing supplies, running the English Connect program, and so much more. We get to enjoy them for a few more months before they finish their mission. Kimber is a cheerful contributor and a bright light!

 

 

Angels graced my house this week. For days and weeks, good friends have been asking what they could do to help me as we prepare to leave for three years. Many of the items on our "to-do" list were items only we could take care of, but I came to the point when everything was packed and it was time to clean the house. With only a few days left before departure, I called upon several friends to help me clean the house and they showed up and DID IT! They were vacuuming, wiping baseboards, wiping down cupboards and drawers, shining mirrors and windows, and even thoroughly wiping down my fridge and freezer. What a lift!  It would have taken me hours and hours to do everything that they did, and I don't know that I would have finished in time. I feel so humble and grateful. They came with smiles and hugs and their service was angelic.

 

When someone dies, people sometimes think it is better not to talk about the death or the deceased person, but often the surviving family members appreciate talking about their loved one. If you have a memory of the loved one, or an experience you had with them, share it; vocalize it or write it down for the family. 

J. William Worden writes, "I sometimes ask a survivor, 'What do you miss about him' (pg. 41)?

Talk about the person who has died—who he was, what he was like, what the family member remembers about him, what they enjoyed doing together, and so on (pg. 68).

Considerable time is spent talking about the deceased, particularly about positive characteristics, qualities, and pleasant activities which the survivor enjoyed with the deceased" (pg. 68).  

"In the past, extended families were close and neighborhoods provided a cohesive bonding which helped people to cope with loss.  But now that sense of community may no longer exist to provide immediate support, nor is the extended family as available. Therefore, people turn to the health care system and the mental health system for support and for care that previously would have come from other sources" (pgs. 3,4).

This quote filled me with a desire to be there for people during a loss. It is disheartening that as a society we are becoming more isolated, more removed and aloof. A community of caring friends is needed  for every hurting individual.  We all take turns being the one who needs the care. Life is beautiful when we look out for each other.

 

I like to watch Richie Saunders play basketball because he gives it his all! He is intense and determined.  I watched a video about him and was interested to learn he has a personal creed.  This creed is described as his internal value system, and no matter what happens around him, he uses this creed to determine who he is, or who he wants to be. Here are the points in his personal creed:

1. Take the time and energy to elevate the one in the moment.

2. Whatever I accomplish on or off the court, always remember that I am no more important than others.

3. No one will question my commitment to the team and to the game.

4. Trust in the 5 a.m.s. It is who I am, so be me.

5. Be relentless in my work ethic.

6. Find the joy in the now.

7. Serve at every possible opportunity.

8. Take the time to connect with God daily.

9. Protect the family name.

Here are a few reasons why I appreciate the gift of the Holy Ghost:

1. The Holy Ghost confirms truth. As I am reading and studying, or listening to someone give a talk or share their testimony, the Holy Ghost confirms to me when I hear truth. I feel the confirmation in my heart and soul and my spirit is touched.

2. The Holy Ghost comforts me. When I am anxious or fearful, the Holy Ghost can assure me, wrapping me in comfort.  Sometimes the Holy Ghost prompts me to remember a past experience or message from the Lord that gives me reassurance. The Holy Ghost helps me to feel safe and hopeful. The Holy Ghost brings the warmth and light of the Atonement into my life.

3. I feel protected with the Holy Ghost as a companion, because I am warned, sometimes as if by flashing lights, and other times by a quiet whisper, when something is not appropriate or is dangerous. 

4. The Holy Ghost not only warns me of things not to do, but I am encouraged and cheered on to do good things. The Holy Ghost nudges me along, helping me to feel confident and courageous. The names of people in my life sometimes come to my mind, and I feel like the Holy Ghost helps me to remember who to reach out to, and when.

5. I drive a car with sensitive lane warnings. If I veer out of my lane, I am reminded to steer back to my lane. The Holy Ghost helps me stay on course. I am reminded of commandments, of feelings and promptings, of ways to improve, and a need to repent.

6. I mentioned that I am driving along, trying to stay in my lane, but where does the road lead? The road/path leads back to the Father. Ultimately, the Holy Ghost is directing me to press forward in faith, relying on the merits of Jesus Christ and headed for exaltation.

I cherish this gift!

Today I read these tips written by Edwin Friedman and I agree with his suggestions. I need to work on #6, specifically calming my mind while I work on one thing, and not thinking about other things but completely zoning in to where I am and what I am doing at the moment.

Suggestions for coping with stress:

1.       Find an outlet for working off stress.

2.       Talk to someone about your worries.

3.       Learn to accept what you cannot change.

4.       Try to balance the time between work and recreation.

5.       Be sure to get sufficient rest and sleep.

6.       Do one thing at a time instead of trying to tackle all of your tasks at once.

7.       Get out and make yourself available instead of sitting alone and feeling sorry for yourself.

8.       Do something for others (pgs. 216, 217, Generation to Generation).

I needed these three angels last week and they came to the rescue. I was in the middle of a sewing project for a friend and my sewing machine broke.  The machine went slower and slower and finally came to a complete stop. I took the machine to the shop and I was told it would take six weeks to be fixed! Oh no! I needed to finish these special projects and I no longer had a sewing machine. I texted three friends and they came over that night with their machines and began sewing squares together and ironing seams. They brought with them cheerful attitudes and a willingness to help. Oh, how I love them!  They accomplished in a couple of hours what would have taken me a couple of weeks to finish.

 

Elder Karl D. Hirst gave a beautiful talk at the October 2024 General Conference. During the talk he included hints as to how we can feel love from our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ, and when and where we can feel it. Here are some of the hints, scattered throughout his talk. I love these thoughts:

His arms are not shortened. They are always long enough to "[reach our] reaching" and embrace each one of us.

I really enjoy the symbolism of mountains being evidence of the certainty of God's love.

The house of the Lord is the home of our most precious covenants and a place for us all to retreat and sink deeply into the evidence of our Father's love for us.

I have also enjoyed the comfort that comes to my soul when I wrap myself more tightly in my baptismal covenant and find someone who is mourning a loss or grieving a disappointment and I try to help them hold and process their feelings.

Birdsong, feeling the sun or a breeze or rain on my skin, and times when nature puts my senses in awe of God--each has had a part in providing me with heavenly connection.

Perhaps the comfort of faithful friends.

General Conference.

Music.

Serving.

A journal.

Your unique place of personal suffering. I wonder, if Jesus were to choose a place where you and He could meet, a private place where you would be able to have a singular focus on Him, might He choose your unique place of personal suffering, the place of your deepest need, where no one else can go? Somewhere you feel so lonely that you must truly be all alone but you aren't quite, a place to which perhaps only He has travelled but actually has already prepared to meet you there when you arrive? If you are waiting for Him to come, might He already be there and within reach?

 Three people I want to remember.

A.: I was asked to visit you because it was difficult for you to leave your room because of the machines you were hooked up to. You had such a bright mind! You engaged immediately in conversation and told me about your family and career. I noticed your positive outlook on life, and I was impressed. Of most interest to me was the fact that you were studying the nature of God, and you wanted to talk about what you were learning. I too have been studying about God and I promised to bring in my notes so that we could continue our discussion. We were interrupted by an aide who took your order for lunch. I remember you ordered cherry pie with ice cream and you had a smile on your face thinking about it.
Sadly you passed away a few hours later and we never were able to continue our discussion. Still, you lifted me. I remember you and what I learned from you.

Ge. was a ray of sunshine! She knew the people who lived by her and she cared about them. She also paid attention to the upcoming activities at the center and supported them. She not only attended the activities and made them fun, but she brought others along with her. I noticed how she found the good in family members as well as staff members.  I learned from Ge. how to be a lifter, even at her age! It was an honor to know her!

Ga. was stricken with a series of strokes which left her unable to communicate clearly, but I sensed her mind was still intact and I talked with her as if she completely understood me. Her smile melted my heart and I also loved her laugh. Ga. was a nurturing soul, often carrying around a babydoll or stuffed animal. She tenderly rocked the baby and sang to it. How I wished I could have known you in previous years. It was an honor to walk with you, talk with you, and sing with you. I miss you!

Another school term has come to a close.  I learn so much every week! Here are just a few notes and quotes from class this past term:

Things to say when visiting with someone...

“I’ve observed….” 

“Help me understand….” 

“I am here as an observer, not in a position of judgment.” 

“I wish I had the right words to say.” 

“I’ve never dealt with this before.”

“I’ve been thinking about you.” 

“It’s good to see you.” 

“You’ve been in my heart.”

“I’m here with you, you’re safe.”

Say "How are you holding up?" rather than "How are you?"

Don’t preach. Don’t judge. Don’t criticize or correct.

Offer comfort and reassurance.

You am there for the one.

Feeling brings healing.

"The agony is great and yet I will stand it.  Had I not loved so very much, I would not hurt so very much.  But goodness knows I would not want to diminish that precious love by one fraction.  I will hurt and I will be grateful for it.  For it bears witness to the depth of our meanings and for that I will be eternally grateful" (Anonymous).

"She has made her loss into an offering, her suffering into a crucible, her pain into medicine." (Chaplain Richard Cronshe)