Happiness is three different zone conference choirs at three different days of multi-zone conferences. These pictures were taken while the choirs were rehearsing. First a piece has to be chosen, and then an instrumentalist is asked to accompany the choir (one instrumentalist for each day/location), and then a group of vocalists is chosen (out of the many volunteers) to sing one verse together before the choir joins in. The numbers amazingly come together in short rehearsals before each zone conference begins. these are not stellar, polished, four-part numbers, but they are beautiful nonetheless.

The missionaries love to perform and be a part of things and I love to hear them sing!

 

Today I cried and that is not usual for me. I try so hard to be brave and not think about what or who I miss, but today homesickness hit and I let the tears come, at least for a few minutes. It all started with lunch. After the branch conference I was handed a carton of lunch. Three very kind ladies made lunch for everyone in the branch, and I appreciate their generosity and service. In the lunch there was a large portion of rice, a meat and vegetable dish, and some kind of sauce in a baggie. I thought the sauce was some kind of gravy to pour on the rice, and as I began to open the baggie, a missionary whispered, "Sister Clarke, don't open that. You don't want to eat that." I asked, "Why? What is it?" The missionary answered, "Pig's blood." I did not open the baggie. I ate a little rice and a few bites of the meat and vegetable dish and then I shut the carton lid. Oh, I should mention that no utensils were handed out. A few people were given hand baggies to eat their food with, but then the baggies ran out so people were eating with their bare hands. 

Then before leaving the chapel, I needed to use the CR (comfort room is what they call a restroom here). I always put off using the CR because the condition of the bathrooms is really disappointing. Sure enough there was no soap, not even a sink, no toilet paper, and the bathroom was very dirty.

When we started the drive home, I began to think of family members I missed at home and a wave of homesickness hit. I thought, "I don't want to be here with pig's blood and dirty bathrooms! I am a lady! I am not used to living like this! I would really like to be with my children on Mother's Day!" The tears fell for about five minutes and then I pulled myself together. It is important for me to stay focused on the blessings of serving here and the beauty found in the people and the country. As is the case with any endeavor, you find what you are looking for. If I focus on all that I miss, I will be miserable, but if I focus on the blessings of being here, I will find happiness. When we arrived home a couple of hours later, I purposefully kicked myself out the door to visit the female senior missionaries and wish them a happy Mother's Day. 

I must not think inward, but outward. This is all good for me and I am experiencing and learning a lot.

"Joseph Smith's First Prayer" is a beautiful hymn and this is a marvelous arrangement of it. The pianist is exceptional as is the blend, dynamics, and emotion of the BYU Women's Choir. The fourth verse is my favorite.

 

This week in our Come Follow Me lesson, a talk is recommended by President Henry B. Eyring titled, "Holiness and the Plan of Happiness." I have listened to the talk repeatedly because lines in his message are meaningful to me, and particularly appropriate for my circumstance.

President Eyring states, "Greater happiness comes from greater personal holiness. Greater holiness will not come simply by asking for it, it will come by doing what is needed for God to change us."

I seek for both greater happiness and greater holiness. I understand that to become more holy I need to allow God to change me, and that requires action on my part, not just wishful thoughts. I have been praying for humility and have been repenting daily, and I can feel a cleansing going on, and an opening of my heart. For some reason, this mission has provided me a chance to thoroughly examine myself, and my weaknesses are glaringly evident. I appreciate the thorough cleaning, though this process is hard work and sometimes painful.

President Eyring quoted President Nelson, "The Lord does not expect perfection from us at this point, but He does expect us to become increasingly pure. Daily repentance is the pathway to purity."

To become "increasingly pure" is such a beautiful phrase. This is my character goal--to become increasingly pure as the world becomes more wicked, to become more like the Savior and full of light, and to allow the Lord to refine and polish me. This purifying process will probably happen slowly and incrementally, but I am trying to face in the right direction and take steps to progress.

 H  U  M  I  L  I  T  Y

Humility is the Christlike attribute I am concentrating on, and I am learning a lot about it. Here are some things I studied today:

Admit.

Apologize.

Be slow to anger.

Be quick to forgive.

Repent.

Cultivate more love.

Speak kinder.

("Is Pride Stopping You From Being a Loving Spouse?" by Aspen Yip, April 2026 Liahona)

Learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart (Matthew 11:29).

Am I meek and lowly of heart?

I will not boast of myself, but I will boast of my God, for in his strength I can do all things (Alma 26:12).

Do I give credit to God for the strength He has provided me?

Always returning thanks unto God for whatsoever things ye do receive (Alma 7:23).

Am I grateful for all that I have received?

I cried unto him in prayer and supplication (Enos 1:4).

Are my prayers earnest and sincere?

When they are learned they think they are wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set it aside, supposing they know of themselves (2 Nephi 9:28).

Do I think I have an issue figured out without asking God for counsel?

Submit cheerfully and with patience to all the will of the Lord (Mosiah 24:15).

Am I patient and cheerful while serving the Lord?

I am impressed with the sculptures of Carol Dunford Jackman. It is intriguing to me that she became a sculptor later in life, and that her experiences as a woman and mother bring emotion to her work. She explains, “My sculpture is an integral part of who I am, and I hope that my work portrays the joy I feel for life, and for the creation of of the work. I sculpt for the love of it, and from the deep emotional need to do it.“

("Of Such is the Kingdom of Heaven")

"Mother in Heaven, Mother of Earth"

 

Two times since arriving in the Philippines we have made our way to Texas Roadhouse and enjoyed an American hamburger. There is a Texas Roadhouse restaurant in a mall not too far away, and after serving after serving of rice, something American tastes absolutely delicious. Ah, the simple pleasures of life! We ate with confidence and there were no stomach issues afterwards. 

Something beautiful happened on Easter Sunday that I would like to tell you about. We attended an Easter Sacrament Meeting (General Conference will be broadcast next week here), and there were meaningful messages shared along with several choir numbers. At one point in the program, a female soloist stepped to the microphone and began singing a solo. Her voice was clear and she was able to sing a wide range of notes easily. As her piece was about to conclude she became emotional and could not sing anymore. The accompaniment continued and the audience looked on, watching and waiting to see if the vocalist could finish the song, and then the ladies in the choir started singing her part from behind her. They knew her piece and were filling in for her until she could control her emotions. She joined them for the last few words of the song. The ladies in the choir had her back! They filled in for her when she could no longer sing because they did not want her number to end with silence. It was an act of love and support, and Matthew and I were both affected by it. My description does not do it justice. 

Hearing the ladies in the choir fill in for the sister who could no longer sing was symbolic to me of how Relief Society sisters have filled in for me in a number of ways. I feel like I have had sisters figuratively right behind me, watching me, supporting me, and ready to step in and sing when I falter. Relief Society sisters are aware and compassionate.

 

Sometimes we speak about the first word of the Restoration being the name Joseph, showing the intimate nature of God—that He knows each of us personally. But perhaps the first and most sacred lesson of the Restoration is that when we kneel in sincerity and call upon God, He delivers.

Each of us will face moments when life feels overwhelming, when we feel burdened by responsibilities and expectations—when the noise and the chaos and the complexity of the world threaten to drown out what matters most.

In those moments, Jesus Christ invites us to come unto Him in prayer, wherein He delivers us—not always by removing the burden but by strengthening us and giving us clarity, peace, and power to move forward with the simplicity found in Him.

I bear witness that Jesus Christ is the source of the abundant life. He is the strength of our roots, the One who brings order and peace and meaning out of complexity.
(“Simplicity that is in Christ,” Steven Shumway, Feb. 3, 2026 BYU Devotional)

I would like to add my testimony to that of Elder Shumway's. Since arriving in the Philippines, I have often felt overwhelmed and burdened, but I have found deliverance and strengthening power through earnest prayer.  The burden is not always lifted, but I am able to deal with the issue or task, and figure it out. Sometimes it is not until a later date that I look back and realize how much I was helped.

One of the happiest things we did this week was to find a Mexican restaurant and go to dinner with many other senior missionaries. Several of these missionaries work in the mission office and their help is needed and appreciated every day. We don't know what we would do without them. One couple came to the Philippines to serve at the education center and they are witnessing the growth of the Pathway program. Another couple flies from island to island organizing humanitarian service projects. The final couple serves as MLS missionaries and are living a couple of hours south of Cebu City, helping to build up a small branch. We have come together here in Cebu with a common purpose, to build the kingdom of God. We feel great love and admiration for the people in this picture!

Mexican food is rare here, so this restaurant was a great find! Even if I had just partaken the chips and guac, I would have left happy.