A friend gave me this book a few months ago when she thought I was stretched too thin and I appreciate her thinking of me. There were several excellent points in the book, although the scriptural references really annoyed me. I'm glad I read it and the points regarding setting boundaries in life and acting from agency instead of resentment, helped me to see my life more clearly. I will share a few excerpts:
Part of taking responsibility, or ownership, is knowing what is our job, and what isn't. Workers who continually take on duties that aren't their will eventually burn out. It takes wisdom to know what we should be doing and what we shouldn't. We can't do everything. (pg. 26)
Knowing what I am to own and take responsibility for gives me freedom. If I know where my yard begins and ends, I am free to do with it what I like. Taking responsibility for my life opens up many different options. However, if I do not "own" my life, my choices and options become very limited. Boundaries help us to distinguish our property so that we can take care of it. We need to keep things that will nurture us inside our fences and keep things that will harm us outside. In short, boundaries help us keep the good and the bad out. Our fences need gates in them. (pgs. 31, 33)
Setting boundaries is mature, proactive, initiative taking. It's being in control of our lives. Individuals with mature boundaries aren't frantic, in a hurry, or out of control. They have direction in their lives, a steady moving toward their personal goals. They plan ahead. (pg. 315)
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