Me Thinks

39 years ago today Matthew and I were married in the Oakland, California Temple, pictured above.  I feel deep gratitude that I was blessed to meet and marry Matthew. He has been a steadfast, supportive, kind, and hard-working husband, and I have enjoyed each chapter of our journey together.

Speaking of marriage, I like the advice Natalie Clay shares:

What if, instead of expecting marriage to automatically bring us more happiness, we viewed it as an opportunity to sacrifice and serve each other—for two flawed people to be more humble, to grow, and to become more Christlike? It might feel scary to get rid of the expectation that marriage should be perpetual bliss. But as we replace this with a commitment to sacrifice for one another, we better align our lives with Christ. 

 Disagreement doesn’t have to be bad. In fact, learning to disagree with kindness and consideration is an excellent way to build humility and compassion. And as you seek to understand your spouse’s point of view, your love can deepen as you truly come to know him or her better.

Too often we place expectations on our spouse to make us feel confident, loved, and secure when we don’t even know how to do those things for ourselves! Expecting your spouse to fulfill all these wants and needs can lead to disappointment and resentment in marriage. You are responsible for your individual happiness. Learn what you need to manage your own emotional health. One of the most liberating truths about marriage is knowing that our emotions are not dictated by our spouse’s words or actions.

Marriage will always have its ups and downs, but the journey through those ups and downs can be one of joy and adventure when we remember that marriage is a stretching opportunity.

("3 Insights into Building a Firm Foundation in Marriage," August 2021 Liahona)